Wednesday, February 29, 2012
I apologize for my blog posts being rather... simple... the last few weeks.
I've been waiting for inspiration to strike to bring you some amazing story that helped shape my life, or some profound reflection on the universe or a divine life-changing moment that I could share with you all.
Inspiration is funny like that. You can't force it. When you write, sometimes the stories flow out of you like lava erupting from a dormant volcano. Other times, the well is dry. It's been a dry-spell, folks.
Instead, all I can come up with is this...
I can't wait for Summer.
I miss the warmth of the sun on my face. I miss watching the bees shuffling from flower to flower in my garden. I miss the sound of the Mourning Doves in the early hours of the day and the repetitive buzz of the frogs late at night. I miss rolling out my yoga mat in the backyard and doing my practice amongst the flies... both butter and dragon. I miss getting my hands in the dirt and feeling like nothing short of a wizard when my seeds start to germinate. I miss the feeling of possibility when it's 8:00pm and it's still not dark outside. The warm night air makes the evening feel endless.
Winter, though a mild one this year, seems to get gloomier with each year that I get older. The short dark days, the cold windy nights, the chill I can't shake even with my thickest socks and favorite sweatshirt.
It's been a long winter for me, one filled with changes... some good... some not so easy. It's a period of change in my life and I'm hoping the warm weather brings with it some forward motion, some closure, some definition, and some DAMN fun. I need it.
I can't wait for fireflies and campfires, boats and mid-day cocktails, sun dresses and sunglasses and Fire Island and Short Beach, both. I want to let my hair down, maybe grow it longer, recklessly forget my sunblock at home and get a dark, deep tan. Take lots of walks on the boardwalk, go fishing (yes, I bait my own hooks) and build a sandcastle with my girls complete with a moat to trap the little silver fish that try to flee our kingdom.
I want backyard parties and barbecues and friends and laughter. Lots of laughter.
Summer makes me feel like the party is getting started and I could truly use a good party right about now. Winter is only about waiting to me. It's only the pause before summer. The setback. The hibernation of fun. Winter makes me wait. (Damn you winter)!
So I look blissfully forward to the summer of 2012. It's going to be a good one, I can feel it... and I can wait... I really can.
So here's to the Summer of 2012. Perhaps I have found my inspiration after all...